Holiday Shmoliday.

So Christmas is approaching like a train on a one way track. Am I ready you ask? nope. But does that actually matter, have I ever been ready for Christmas when it sneaks up on me every year on the 25th of December. Again, nope.

But this year it seems as though my holiday cheer is hiding from me. I can't seem to get into it. My heart isn't quite bubbling as it usually is when there are but 10 days until Christmas. Am I getting too old? Is my house not "Christmassy" enough? Have I not spend enough money? None of the above, yet for some reason, it just doesn't feel like Christmas yet.

I've been listening to carols, singing along, spending time with family and friends and still, it just feels like the holidays are so far away.

The only thing which feels remotely like Christmas is that I had my annual mini meltdown yesterday, and the day before. Yes annual, my Hubby reminded me that I have one every year. Just for that I am thinking of bringing on the full fledged melt-down-o-rama on his hinny* this year, like a hammer... ok so I won't- but it could be a new Christmas tradition :)

So I am feeling the overwhelming sensations about Christmas, but where is the joy? the ridiculous giddyness, the fun stuff? Maybe I need a drink. Maybe I need more time. Maybe I need to think about all of the fun Christmas was when I was 7. Or maybe I need to just enjoy the journey and know that even though it feels different, it is still the most wonderful time of the year.

*hinny |ˈhinē|

noun ( pl. -nies)the offspring of a female donkey and a male horse.(we use to this as a nice way of saying ASS- hence the donkey reference, I had no idea- but use the word all the time- dang it, ya learn something new everyday jackass**)
** Now this got me thinking and look what I found: First of all a Jackass is a male donkey, so I'm thinking a female donkey could be a Jillass. I'm probably wrong, but I digress - look what I found:
Jackass in Geography- oh my goodness, I love the internet.

• Jackass Aeropark, an airport
• Jackass Ski Bowl, ski resort, now Silver Mountain (Idaho)
• Jackass Mountain, an infamous stretch of the Cariboo Road through the Fraser Canyon in British Columbia, Canada
• Jackass Flats, Nevada, former nuclear-test site
• Jackass Lane, a street in Anchorage, Alaska whose name was changed in the 1980s due to frequent street sign thefts

Alrighty, now I'm feeling more festive. Live long and prosper!M.